The Human Response: When the Living itself is Belied

5×16 – Fish Out of Water

5×07 – The Livelong Day 

4×20 – Purity 

4×11 – Drive 

3×18 – The Dragon and The Fairy 

3×11 – Higher Power 

What happens when, our belief is belied? What happens when, those who are supposed to take care of us betray our belief? What happens when, our nurturers become our exploiters? What happens when, our brethren become our foe? What happens when, we start ceasing to exist? What is our Human Response? Do we accept our loss? Or do we fight back? Or we just keep fighting until we die?

Joe Sachs

Seeing him from last two seasons since Season 3 when he joined the team, I am seeing that Joe Sachs has good grip on the NCIS LA characters. He knows all of them. He is the Consulting Producer for the show and previously worked as the writer for ER along with R Scott Gemmill. He is a doctor by profession, but writes stories on varieties of subjects. On the NCIS interpersonal dynamics, he takes care of the partnership dynamics without compromising the story needs. He adds resolution of the emotion towards the actions that the characters perform. The reason in terms of the emotion is addressed and depicted. On the story side, he picks up sensitive movies, documentaries or books that sensitively question the whys and wherefores of the routines suddenly developing into the catastrophic attention. Along the same sensitive lines, Sachs develops his story, using the same title albeit weaving the story to fit the NCIS LA format. In his stories, the subjects are very important. They are responsible but frustrated human beings trying to make a point, fighting the system as the Higher Power governing them has cheated them, failing to protect them and instead doing the exact opposite for believing in them. They are remorseful of their drastic action that they are reduced to take and would not wanted to take this approach, but feel that they have reason enough to go for the drastic step to teach the lesson to the Higher Power. His stories are poignant portrayals of ideals gone wrong, passions and dreams of people belied and the individuals effort to make it good, fighting with the last straw they have. There is a sensitive and subtle treatment of human subjects, focussing on the casualty and human costs of any ideal cause gone wrong. He forces us to see what has been forgotten, overlooked, until someone challenges authorities to look into things what they have missed. That is Human Response: When the Living itself is Belied. The dominant emotion of a Joe Sachs episode is Pain, Love and Courage. Its a cathartic process.

I have liked all Joe Sachs stories so far. They can never be much widely discussed, but there is that poignant pain; that lingers on our minds. That emotion about feeling the sense of loss gives us through the subject’s pain and that; there also exists a stronger emotion of moral propriety within the subject’s mind, which cannot be snuffed into oblivion or indifference; which drives him to to keep fighting for in order to survive. The lingering feel about the interplay of those emotions of rebellion, disillusionment and retribution; sticks to our mind and our imagination starts to expand it. Take any episode written by Joe Sachs, the stories appeal to us because of the subjects involved could be the disillusioned miscreant fighting for justice in his own way, who makes us look deep into matters we otherwise would never pay attention to. 

I am restricting my analysis to Season 5 Episodes presently. When I do get to start writing summaries and analysis for the past 4 seasons, I will add others to the list.

Season 5

In this season, we have had two Joe Sach stories. 5x07-The LivelongDay and 5x16-Fish Out of Water

Livelong Day has two references. Its Barbara Garson’s book, “All the Livelong Day: The Meaning and Demeaning of Routine Work” and David Fenster’s movie “The Livelong Day.” The movie is actually based on Trains and is about passionate people for whom Train is a way of life, who cannot see Trains being taken away from them. The essential argument underlying in the Book : "All the Livelong Day: The Meaning and Demeaning of Routine Work" is that human beings want to work. We love work. Work is part of our nature. But human beings don't work with the unstoppable fervor of machines, so the people who dole out work have tried to compress us into the role of industrial robots. Barbara Garson doesn't pretend to be impartial. She's outspokenly socialist, believing that the people who do jobs are best capable of judging how those jobs ought to be done. She is not looking for a free hand in the world, and she's not looking to loaf on the clock. But when work is stripped of its inherent meaning and reduced to trivial repetetive twists and pulls, this necessarily strips the workers of some of their noble humanity.

5x07-Livelong Day is the story is about Mitch Rome, who dreamt all his life to work for Rail Roads, did all his study about trains and rail roads and yet, his employer, denies him his right to work just because he became "The Man who knew too much" and had to be erased out of the system. Mitch Rome is the Train Brakesman for FWRY Railroads. He has always loved trains and wanted to be the engineer.He was to be promoted as the engineer when he is fired on charges of Marijuana intake and causing an accident. Its a false charge on Mitch Rome by his company as he was being the whistle-blower to his corporation when he was sending letters to them to stop running the freight trains carrying dangerous chemicals from busy downtown areas against the FRA guidelines. His employers instead of listening to his pleas, fire him and then hire a detective Anthony Tregor to end him. Anthony Tregor successfully frames Mitch Rome in the Train Gaurd killing case along with Bellamy, convinces Bellamy to blow up the train that Mitch Rome was planning to hijack. Mitch Rome has only one intention- to make people hear and see what he is saying. He wants to make a point by stopping the train in busy down-town area. Alas his train brakes are failed and he cannot do that. The NCIS team helps him in two ways, 1) clearing him of marijuana intake and finding evidence of how his employers framed him 2) preventing the disaster that he set on the sabotaged train when he started his mission. His mother and him are actually good people. The son gets caught in the employers punishing him for doing his job. His plight is like Barbara Garsen’s Book “All the Livelong Day: The Meaning and Demeaning of Routine Work”. Mitch’s work is demeaned by his own employers when they should have been proud of him for doing the job correctly. 

Fish Out of Water is documentary movie about “what does Bible have to say about being gay?” In this story, Joe Sachs weaves a story for Densi and Deeks, with the serious side of the “Love Story” coming up for the first time after Frozen Lake. The complication of two working partners falling in love and what implications each can have regards to his or her career is touched upon through the Guest character DEA Agent Talia. And yet by the end of the episode, Deeks is adamant about what he wants. If he fell in love with his work-partner and it has become a purposeful and meaningful existence for him, makes him a better person, he would fight for all of it, and be ready for any kind of fight he has to take up with his authorities. The simple human reason being, how can falling in love be demeaned as complicated if one can be reasonable enough to work it out. 

For all of these arguments, there are consequences and the persons, who ask these questions get charged of breaking the law, but in the end, their question is valid enough for us to put our thoughts to amend a wrong. We can see that the emotional meltdown that Deeks goes through in 5x16-FishOutofWater consequences both professionally and personally, he starts to fight for his own individuality, his beliefs, all that his existence is made of in the subsequent episodes. It starts becoming a fight between him and authority as represented by Henrietta Lange and a fight between him and professionalism as represented by Special Agent Kensi Blye. In 5x19-SpoilsofWar, Deeks disproves Hetty that he can let his emotions get in the middle of the rescue operation. Even if he loses himself briefly, Deeks finds his ground. And continuing with his spirit of talking back to Hetty for being right, although well within the permissible limits of talking back to his Boss, Deeks demands of Hetty, when is she going to allow Kensi to work with him. "I want my partner back". That happens in 5x20-Windfall. There is clear articulation of Hetty remarking on Deeks questions, "yet you question about my judgement". Deeks though acting subservient to Hetty, does not relent on what he personally thinks of her decision. Hetty does relent, He lets Kensi start working with Deeks. And after working a case together, Deeks goes for another rebellious questioning with Kensi and shows her what he thinks of her personal investment towards him. That's in 5x21-Three Heats. Kensi's indecisiveness towards their relationship, Deeks sees it as a professional affront to his capabilities as seen through her personal and professionally critical eyes. So just by being a good work-partner to her, he lets go the personal dangling "thing" between them, showing Kensi that if she prefers professionalism, then so be it. He breaks away from her. Its slam dunk case he makes for himself against two judging women against his professional integrity. One has to either trust or distrust. One cannot be in perpetual doubtful state of "is he going to be one of us or be the weakling or a traitor, just because he is good at his undercover persona." Deeks cannot let Kensi become the DEA Agent like Talia or cannot let him get turned into Paulo Angelo as the NCIS under Hetty make of him. Slam Dunk rebellion of the Crass Distrust.

PTSD and Recovery for Sam and Deeks

PTSD - Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is a type of anxiety disorder. It can occur after you have gone through an extreme emotional trauma that involved the threat of injury or death. 

Through 5x02-Impact, 5x05-Unwritten Rule and 5x06-Big Brother, NCIS LA seems to show what PTSD looks like for men returning from action. They hint the most common symptoms that people develop - anxiety, risky behaviour, suicidal acts, Cold hands (Raynaud's syndrome) and stress cardiomyopathy.

For Sam, the emotional trauma he underwent during his torture was relatively easy to recover from. He is a Navy Seal and trained to handle torture and extreme circumstances. Yes, being so close to losing Michelle in the Siderov and Nukes Recovery case in 4x24 and 5x01 episodes, Sam was emotionally under a lot of stress, so much that he lost it with his partner Deeks while on the case. Torture followed him soon later on the mission. And even then, being close to getting killed, the weight that was on his mind was his protective feelings about his wife Michelle who was still on the mission. Sam never actually felt the void emotionally for him to feel the trauma of Siderov's torture. He had his vested interests in the mission and once having saved his wife, he had solid support from his wife and Partner Callen so that he comes to term of feeling the loss that he was almost going to get had it not been for Deeks who saved his life first and then later came on the scene to save Michelle. Like Sam said, he owed to Deeks for the rest of his life for backing him up inspite of him being a jerk with him, while on the mission. 

There were a lot of things happening for Sam over his mind while he was under torture. Likewise once out of it he had lot of support from family and friend. He has a worried wife in Michelle and also has a worried partner in Callen to see through his recovery. Michelle doesn't let Sam do his dishes or Callen buys expensive tickets to Laker's game. And personally, Sam is a tough Seal trained to handle and recover. These were the things that let him quickly recover from his trauma. He explains to Nate Getz, his psychologist, one has to "let go", as there is nothing one can do about it. That is the mantra of recovery from the traumatic shocks. And he loves the fact that people care about him. But then it also adds to his anxiety. He is anxious about that day, when he loses it, when he is unable to let it go and he is unable to reconnect to rationality, and what would be the consequences for those who depend on him to protect them. Sam confessed to Nate, that his trauma is beginning to get "cumulative" and his worry is about his ability to "reconnect" like always. He worries about that, but for now decides to push it to the back of the mind and enjoy life without worry, with his loved ones.

For Deeks, the recovery from his emotional trauma is not not so easy. Unlike Sam, Deeks had contrarian situations. He had been singled out in the mission from the rest of the team and was kept on overwatch for Sam. Sam did not want him. Deeks felt himself as the third wheel. If this was not enough, there was an emotional drift between him and his partner Kensi Blye. Amidst solving their issues, in the heat of the moment he kissed her, but they did not have time to discuss what it meant. The emotional drift transformed into the white elephant in the room for them. All of this was taking a toll on Deeks mind with actually none to share his feelings, with nothing to feel proud about and just going about doing his job. May be it was becoming a thankless job. May be he was not the cop that he thought he was, if people cannot trust him. May be doesn't belong to NCIS OSP office and he need not be working anymore with the team, if he cannot be treated as par with them or people have doubts about his character and work style. It is this void, lack of support in the form of friends or colleagues and finally the doubts arising within him about his being suited for the job, which adds to his anxiety post Siderov's torture.

On the physical recovery side, he has new teeth transplanted, slowly recovering to have food from liquid to solid food. However emotional recovery seems distant. Instead he slips into PTSD. He starts worrying about voices in his head and starts wondering whether, he is truly a "Shaggy" like his team calls him, or "schizophrenic" like his partner called him. He starts feeling "halfway being a homeless" as he doesn't feel he belongs to anyplace in particular or anyone whom he can go and feel something with him. He starts feeling the drift. Best understood as it starts when he talks to Sam in the hospital, about "Done being a Cop", when he talks to Kensi in the Bullpen at OSP about what he plans to do "I don't know", when he talks to Hetty at his home about him having a case of "Insomnia" and when finally talking to Nate, the OSP Psychologist; about what worries him and why he is unable to sleep. He is worried why his mind won't stop running and what happens if it does not stop. Nate explains that its a positive sign indeed for him to worry about it and that does mean that he is on the right path. 

It is also amply clear to Nate that Deeks doesn't have any support system that he can fall back on like Sam could. There is no one at Deeks home or in his mind a friend who can take care of him or if he could talk to. This causes his concsious mind to concentrate on his worries rather than sleeping and having his subconscious resolve the worry for him by adding a meaning to the torture and trauma he underwent. Nate tries to help Deeks, by providing a possible support in his partner Kensi Blye. As a psychologist, Nate cannot suggest anything, but he just adds that reference so that Deeks can start thinking about something else than his worries. Indeed the thought of Kensi is much more warmer and meaningful than him trying to find an answer to his anxieties in a fast track manner. However, as it seems wonderful, its not that easy to just talk to Kensi, especially now that he kissed her and doesn't know what to do next. Kensi never raised it again. He doesn't know whether she approves it or disapproves it. So what happens next? Ball is in Kensi's court.

Readers can read my other analysis I wrote about the Impact on Deeks that caused a greater trauma to resolve. "The Understated Action and Psychological Drift through Season 4 Ending to Season 5 Cold Opening"

Like Nate and Hetty rightly observe for people dealing with their PTSD, they need to have support systems in place. Hetty starts it with a carrot and stick approach. She makes a visit to Deeks apartment and expresses to him that she needs him to report back to duty, if he does not want her to start looking for a replacement for Kensi for a new partner. It works indeed. All of a sudden Deeks feels "wanted". He means something to his Manager and so she took the trouble of visiting him at his home. Now he has to see if Kensi feels him wanted as much at workplace. But that thought only opens up the can of worms in his mind.  Kensi has been calling him. Repeatedly and he has been declining her calls. Why? Why is unable to talk to her? What has changed? He doesn't know if she is calling him with the sympathy she has for her partner or she actually cares about him. She definitely cares about him. But that care is only for him as her work-partner. Whereas He, loves her. What if she doesn't feel the same about him. He cannot resolve truly, what he has with Kensi for a relationship, just the partnership or something he longs for more from her. Kensi doesn't provide him any hint. It keeps on adding anxiety to his already anxious mind yet to recover from the emotional trauma. Wish he could just sleep! so that he could go back to work and see how matters stand right now with Kensi !

Amazingly, Kensi lands at his doorstep, with dinner in her hand. She wants to avenge Deeks ignoring her Cronuts that she put at his doorstep. She wants him to have dinner with her and also watch a boring movie "Burnt Offering". After all Kensi doesn't just want him as her work partner. She wants him to watch along with her, the bore movies that she loves. She loves them indeed, but cannot watch them alone. She is now wanting to watch one with him. Ofcourse, it may not have been direct saying by Kensi that she loves him. But when has been Kensi been direct with him or said more than what she wanted to say. Kensi does love him. Its a Love Story indeed between him and Kensi. That is how he is able to answer the question that Nate posted about his relationship with Kensi. 

A visit from Hetty, Nate and Kensi suddenly makes Deeks feel at home, come away from drifting into being homeless. He sleeps. Insomnia getting recovered. That was in 5x02 Impact.  Pretty soon from thereon, Deeks starts on his healing journey. The slow journey of Deeks recuperating from his PTSD and his anxiety issues starts through his reactionary approach to interactions around him. The ice-breaking moment is of course him rejoining the team in 5x03-Omni. Hetty gifts him with a new gun but having same safety manual. That's how much well his boss knows him. So does Kensi know his personal preferences about his gun. What else can he want? Two of his dearly loved women taking care of him now. But is he ready for work? Can he shoot? That's his anxiety. Hetty's note to not close the box, forces him to test himself at the firing range.  Kensi's questions if he is back to work, forces him to accept that yes, he is back to work, but one day at a time. After a day of work with hits (diving down to save a woman's life) and misses (failing to gun down a man), Callen states to him, that he cannot accept him back to work if he keeps second-guessing himself. That forces Deeks to look into Callen's eyes and say that he is ready for work.

Deeks anxiety is now centered on Kensi. Kensi had mentioned to him “how she missed him at work". Kensi’s words and actions matter to him. She missed him, then he makes sure that he comes to work regularly. She is worried about him not taking a shot or trying too hard to make him a competitive Agent. Yes, he indulged in wall climbing competition with Callen to make her happy in 5x04 episode. He never ever did that before.He is bent on proving to her and everyone that he is doing good, ready to take any kind of risky job. If she thinks he is trying to kill himself by riding a motor bicycle like in 5x05 episode, because statistics speak so about a PTSD patient, then he wants to prove her otherwise that he is taking care of his health by doing exercise that is good for his heart through a treadmill installed at his work station in 5x06 episode. All of this is going quite overboard with his antics to address Kensi's concerns and make her go away from baby-sitting him. Her answer to his saying that "she does not have to worry about him" is that she does have to worry about him as he is her partner. It is good to hear that but it is certainly not pleasing for Deeks to get saved by Kensi like it happens in 5x05.  This is now certainly directing him to address his anxiety around his "emotional center" like Hetty warns. His emotional center is Kensi and Kensi is certainly more worried about him than she should be. He needs to quieten down for her sake, so she can calm down. Further, he needs to focus and get his emotional control back. He needs to get away from doing what Kensi does, bike rides, competitions etc and instead do what is pleasing to him.

He has to take support from Hetty to find himself back. Without Hetty's support and guidance, Deeks would not have known what he has to do. Those four episodes from Impact to Livelong Day, all have Hetty's push for Deeks to get better. His treadmill idea is not taken seriously and seen as an antic by everyone in 5x06, but Deeks sees it as non-risky diversion for him away from Kensi and infact a good exercise to stabilize his emotions. However, he realizes how bored he is trying it too hard to make any point. He starts letting it go, starts relaxing in his natural way. He is back to taking caffiene, coffee like he does normally. That is the 5x06-Big Brother Stakeout moment in the car, where without his realizing, he starts teasing Kensi like his old self. He is picqued that she doesn't like a moustache and here he is with all that bearded face. He teases her about her dislike for facial hair. Its a small gesture though, but definitely the indolent, easy going, drawling Deeks is back.  

The next episode 5x07-Livelong Day has him finding fun by himself reading about planetary movements, studying Astrology. Mercury in retrogade is fun, but more importantly the case closes with Deeks not only enjoying his undercover Ops with Kensi in a very comfortable way, it closes with Deeks getting the Prairie Tac train to play that he had yearned as a child since he was five. To me that was the moment, when it felt to me that Deeks was cured of his PTSD. His childlike innocence, sparkle, imagination and twinkle in his eye takes him away from all cares and just lets him into his native Deeks state, which he was so worried of losing as expressed when talking to his psychologist Nate Getz. Probably that moment on everything starts making sense. It is also the episode where Deeks plays the undercover part of FRA employee Matthew who suffers from OCD and has anxiety issues on a simple case as Fire alarm ringing. Deeks in clear contrast is far recovered from PTSD issues. He is now playing with those symptoms to work on his undercover role. It is also the episode where Hetty instead of indulging his wishes or chastising him, just teases him with pleasure about his Mercury retrogade talk and also shares his excitement about the old train, though in excitement she does ruin his effort about building the track for the train and spoiling the fun for him. She is confident about Deeks in every way that he was recovered and it was also an excitement within her with the same feelings as Deeks for the train. That settles the matters for everyone including Deeks, that his antics or eccentricities can be fun and emotional for others too. No more anxiety issues and no more Deeks antics in Bullpen to make a point.